by Nadia S.
This is a guest post from Inanna’s partner, the EmpowerHer Initiative. Through EmpowerHer, Inanna is platforming the voices of women and girls in Afghanistan. Learn more about EmpowerHer here.
I’m in a beautiful place. I don’t know where I am, but I can feel its beauty—the softness
of the wind, the scent of the earth, and the distant sound of waves.
I’m here… but why?
I’ve asked myself this question so many times that I feel even I no longer know the
answer.
I try to understand myself, but it’s as if there’s a locked door inside me.
Who am I?
What am I doing here?
Why don’t I feel like I belong anywhere?
Wait… let me tell you.
For as long as I can remember, I’ve been carrying a heavy shadow inside me.
As if I’ve been sitting in a corner of darkness for years, never letting the light reach me.
Sometimes I believe I am the reason bad things happen.
It always feels like the worst possibilities find me.
I think I would be happy doing the things I love.
But then the words slip right through my mind when I read a book…
Shadows fall on me as I walk among people…
And when I get close to someone, my heart pulls back in fear.
Why?
Why am I always sad?
Why can’t I laugh like everyone else?
Am I not human?
Do I even have a heart?
All I ever wanted was simple:
For someone to love me.
For someone to say, “I’m here with you.”
Did I ever ask for more?
I always felt like my destiny was written with black tears.
Everything looked dark.
Yet I could still feel something pure inside me—
a clean, innocent, gentle light…
As if I didn’t belong to the darkness at all.
But why couldn’t that light ever show itself?
One morning, I woke up as if nothing had happened.
But there was a small voice inside me saying:
“Irmak… you don’t have to stay like this.”
I love cakes and coffee.
They always give me peace.
Maybe there’s a hidden hope in their scent.
Maybe the light of my life is inside them.
“Yes,” I told myself.
“I will find my own light.”
I will rent a shop.
Somewhere close to the sea where the wind blows sweetly…
And I will open my own small cake & coffee shop.
My name is Irmak.
For years I underestimated myself, but now I know:
I can do something.
Even a small success would still be my success.
And I did it.
I opened the shop.
The salty smell of the sea fills the doorway, and my own drawings hang on the walls…
The scent of pastries mixes with coffee and turns the place into a little fairytale.
I tried flavors I had never tasted before; each one carries a piece of me.
I waited for customers for days.
Sometimes with hope, sometimes with disappointment…
But I didn’t give up.
And today…
For the first time, many customers came.
They praised my cakes;
“They’re so delicious!” they said.
In that moment, a door opened inside me.
The light that had been hidden for years finally began to shine.
For the first time in my life, I did something for myself.
And I succeeded.
I hope everyone finds a job they love someday.
Because people heal the most while doing what they love.
I realized nothing was as bad as I imagined.
And I wasn’t as worthless as I believed.
I had just been standing in the wrong place.
When you find the right place, everything changes.
No one is bad, weak, or unworthy.
Sometimes we just choose the wrong place or the wrong dream.
But humans are strong.
The light inside them only needs to shine once.
I found my place and my love in cakes and coffee.
I built a small but colorful world for myself.
I met people with beautiful souls.
My heart no longer faces the darkness; it faces the sun.
And what about you?
Where is your place?
Where is the light of your heart hidden?
Go and find it—because you don’t want to be late.
My story doesn’t end here.
I will love more, create more, share more.
Maybe one day, I will be the cup of coffee in your story.
Start now…
Because life can truly be beautiful.
Nadia S is from Afghanistan and a recent high school graduate with a deep passion for literature and creative expression. She writes poems and prose that reflect her personal experiences, emotions, and observations of the world around her. Nadia has a strong interest in philosophy and storytelling, and she continually seeks to grow through reading and writing. Her work often explores themes of identity, memory, resilience, and the unseen layers of human life. Through her writing, she hopes to connect with readers and give voice to thoughts and feelings that are often left unspoken.